In which I meet a fifth grader

When I show up to get That Guy for school, he's discussing Thursday's quiz with one of his students.

T.G.: This is Mrs. T.G.

Student: Your wife?

T.G.: Yes.

Student: She's small.

Adventures in cooking

As mentioned previously, That Guy loves New Mexican green chiles, which, in the Midwest, are only available as greenish mush in tiny aluminum cans.  Here, I can buy the fresh, Hatch-grown chiles at the grocery store (at least for a month or two in the fall).  Don't they look beautiful?

And I haven't paid a dime for them.  No, I'm not a shoplifter.  Every single time I buy them, the store rings them up at the wrong price--and so they give them to me free.  I'm up to four-and-a-half pounds of free green chiles.

My last green-chile dish was chiles rellenos, which, in the New Mexican style, are smothered in a green chile sauce.  Cooking with chiles is always interesting because they're unpredictable.  Where most restaurants post their soup-of-the-day, New Mexican places have a sign that says "Today's green chile is: hot."  Because they are used whole, the heat level varies from batch to batch.

So at dinner, T.G. and I were starting on our deliciously crispy chiles rellenos. As the first forkful went into my mouth, it brushed my lip.  Whoa! I put it back down. We had an extra-hot batch. I ended up eating my dinner with a giant dollop of plain yogurt (which we often use instead of sour cream) and a glass of whole milk.  T.G. ate his chiles wrapped in tortillas. But we were still sweating. 

Making green chile sauce from scratch was an adventure, but I probably won't repeat it. Like making pie from an actual pumpkin instead of from prepared pumpkin puree, the savings just isn't worth amount of time spent. The chiles have to be roasted and peeled before they can be used, and I can get big tubs of pre-roasted/peeled/chopped chile in the freezer section.  But when I need whole chiles (for rellenos, of course), it's totally worth it.

For the record, to roast chiles:
1. Stick them under the broiler, turning occasionally, until they're no longer crisp and the skins have bubbled up and blackened.
2. Let them sit a few minutes in a sealed plastic bag or covered bowl.  The steam helps loosen the skins further.
3. Peel off the skins.
4. For whole chiles to stuff, slit them down one side and remove as much of the seeds and membranes as possible, leaving the stems attached.
5. For sauce, remove the stems, seeds, and membranes; and chop.
6. WASH YOUR HANDS. DO NOT TOUCH YOUR EYES OR MUCOUS MEMBRANES.

My not-really-a-recipe for chile sauce:
2-3 cups of chopped green New Mexican chile
1 Tbsp. fat (lard, bacon grease, canola oil if you have to)
1 Tbsp. ground beef
Salt
Enough water to make everything is a little floaty

All amounts are approximate.  Simmer together for at least 30 minutes, stirring occasionally, 'til the ground beef is cooked and the chile has broken up into the liquid a bit more.  At this point, I would cover the saucepan and leave it over low heat until whatever I'm serving it with is ready, adding a little more water as needed.

A few minutes before serving, stir in about a tablespoon of flour to thicken.