Introduction

The kiddo was chatting with a lady at the grocery store.

"Nice to meet you. This is my friend Mama."

Change is hard

While vacuuming, I rotated the kitchen table about 45 degrees, so the kiddo had a slightly different view from her clip-on highchair.

Her, despairing: My chair! MY CHAIR! Where is it?
Me: You mean the one you're sitting in?
Her, relieved: It's right here!

Affirmed

It was the kiddo's birthday.

T.G: Isn't this the best cake you've ever had?
Kiddo: This is the best cake in the WORLD!

It was this chocolate cake (in two 8-in. layers) with this strawberry buttercream, by the way.

Shocked, shocked

T.G. was singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" to himself when the kiddo confronted him.

"Daddy?! You killed a man?!"