Conversational

[An 18-month-old, Kid 2, walks into the kitchen where her mother is doing some work, including slicing a block of cheese.]

Kid 2: Tee! Tee! Tee! (Cheese! Cheese! Cheese!)
[Mother hands Kid 2 a slice of cheese.]
Kid 2: Tinks! (Thanks!) Bye-bye-bye-bye.
[Exit.]

There's always next year

Scene: It's Sunday night, and the family is discussing football at the dinner table.

Kiddo: Bengals and Cardinals are my favorite teams.
Mom: Pampa will be happy to hear that. But what about the Vikings?
Dad: Do you like the Vikings?
Kiddo, apologetically: I don't like Vikings. They don't... They don't really do touchdowns.

Obvious

Kid 1 is playing outside with her friends after church.

Kiddo: I'M IN THE TREE. I'M INNNNNN THE TREEEEEE!
Friend: That's not how you play hide and seek.

Congruent

Kid 1 has composed two songs, "Go to Sleep" and "Christmas."

"Go to Sleep" is a lullaby for her sister and is sung to the famous tune known as Ah! vous dirai-je, maman. It goes:

A, B, C, D,
Go to sleep!

"Christmas" is described as her favorite Christmas song and has the same melody.

A, B, C, D,
Christmas hat!

Software bugs

Kid 1 had three volume settings: Normal, Yelling, and Shrieking. (She didn't get it from me. I'm blaming dad's mom's branch of the family [you know who you are].) Unfortunately, the Normal setting has a funny quirk where, after .5-2 seconds, it reverts to one of the other two settings at random.

You might live with a classicist if...

...it's Christmastime and you're a little miffed at Bing Crosby and Andrea Bocelli for pronouncing "Venite adoremus" wrong.

The twenty-third day before Christmas

O Come, All Ye Faithful
Attributed to John Francis Wade
Translator: Frederick Oakeley
Tune: Adeste Fideles

O come, all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant,
O come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem;
come and behold him, born the King of angels;

O come, let us adore him, O come, let us adore him,
O come, let us adore him, Christ the Lord.

God of God, Light of Light;
lo, he abhors not the Virgin's womb;
very God, begotten, not created; 

Sing, choirs of angels, sing in exultation,
sing, all ye citizens of heav'n above:
glory to God in the highest; 

Yea, Lord, we greet thee, born this happy morning;
Jesus, to thee be all glory giv'n;
Word of the Father, now in flesh appearing;

Adeste fideles læti triumphantes,
Venite, venite in Bethlehem.
Natum videte
Regem angelorum: 

Venite adoremus
Dominum. 

Deum de Deo, lumen de lumine
Gestant puellæ viscera
Deum verum, genitum non factum. 

Cantet nunc io, chorus angelorum;
Cantet nunc aula cælestium,
Gloria, gloria in excelsis Deo, 

Ergo qui natus die hodierna.
Jesu, tibi sit gloria,
Patris æterni Verbum caro factum.

Luke 2:10-18 (KJV)

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men. And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us. And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger. And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child. And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

From the Nicene Creed:

I believe [...] in one Lord Jesus Christ, the only-begotten Son of God,

begotten of his Father before all worlds:
God of God, Light of Light, very God of very God,
[... Who] was incarnate by the Holy Spirit of the virgin Mary,

John 1:14 (KJV)

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.

The twenty-fourth day before Christm

Comfort, Comfort Ye My People (modernized as "Comfort, Comfort O/Now/All My People")

Translator: Catherine Winkworth

Author: Johann Olearius (1671)
Tune: Genevan 42 (Louis Bourgeois)

Comfort, comfort ye my people,
Speak ye peace, thus saith our God;
Comfort those who sit in darkness,
Mourning 'neath their sorrows' load;
Speak ye to Jerusalem
Of the peace that waits for them,
Tell her that her sins I cover,
And her warfare now is over. 

Yea, her sins our God will pardon,
Blotting out each dark misdeed;
All that well deserved His anger
He will no more see nor heed.
She hath suffer'd many a day,
Now her griefs have passed away,
God will change her pining sadness
Into ever-springing gladness. 

For Elijah's voice is crying
In the desert far and near,
Bidding all men to repentance,
Since the kingdom now is here.
Oh that warning cry obey,
Now prepare for God a way;
Let the valleys rise to meet Him,
And the hills bow down to greet Him. 

Make ye straight what long was crooked,
Make the rougher places plain,
Let your hearts be true and humble,
As befits His holy reign;
For the glory of the Lord
Now o'er earth is shed abroad,
And all flesh shall see the token
That His Word is never broken.

St. Olaf College Cantorei

Solo voice and acoustic guitar

What is this I can't even

Isaiah 40:1-5 (KJV)
Comfort ye, comfort ye my people, saith your God. Speak ye comfortably to Jerusalem, and cry unto her, that her warfare is accomplished, that her iniquity is pardoned: for she hath received of the Lord's hand double for all her sins. The voice of him that crieth in the wilderness, Prepare ye the way of the Lord, make straight in the desert a highway for our God. Every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill shall be made low: and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough places plain: And the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

(Also famously set by Handel)